人际关系

生活中总是有意想不到的元素，其实太多事真的不在自己的控制范围之内。有些时候想着要做好的事越是要做好反而越做不好。不是说对于目标很迷茫，而是对于身边发生的事觉得迷茫吧。感觉一直以来人缘还可以，工作之后发觉人缘实在是太差，有很多时候会问是不是我有问题呢？

不过现在如果遇到什么不开心的事，其实处理的时间也越来越短。尽量不让自己介意吧，慢慢的学会在最快的时间里面放下然后往前走。不同的人有不同的情绪，拿捏不好就会遭殃，也是挺正常的吧。

昨天同事说我怎么那么多感触，我总感觉是经验累积下来吧。以前把很多的事都看得很轻，感触特别少。现在很多时候就把小事看得太重，做了什么都会稍微反省一下。也可能是麻木了太久，很多情绪其实不怎么能释放，所以比较闲的时候感触就特别多。

无论如何，知识永远都是不够时间学习的。每一天基本上都会发觉很多自己不知道的事，也不知道会不会有那么一天自己会觉得至少不是什么都不懂吧。表现平庸也未尝不是一件好事，至少能够有更多的时间去学习，去思考，去闯。要不怕失败，才有更多的机会。

Training week

Went through 4 days of training, I will say that 4 days are sort of the most meaningful days in 2017. The first that caught me out of nowhere was how to manage clients. I was picked by the presenter on purpose and as expected I was really bad in it. Nervous, low confident, shaky, sort of a "good example to be corrected from". Of course won't be too happy because of that, expected some embarrassment but somehow really appreciate the feedback. I definitely know my weakness and things to improve on. For the past 23 years had been trying to be myself, but sometimes I probably just need to adapt to real life situations. That's how life should be.

Went through another 1.5 days of training regarding my day-to-day job. The patience guidance from my seniors are definitely the things that I appreciate the most. The main reason why I still remain is actually because of the people that I appreciate and want to learn from. Learnt a lot about client facing as usual, but the key takeaway is definitely to be confident in what I am doing. No matter what, need to be sure as hell of what I did and solve all the doubts.

The last session was the one I need the most for now. It was actually similar to the principals that I have from a few years back. The two lines of lyrics that had been accompanying me for years, will still motivate me from now on. “当我和世界不一样，那就让我不一样”，“逆风的方向，更适合飞翔”. The emotional challenges this year was one of the hardest to manage and I am still going through it. I believe there will be more in the future and I will always prepare to go through it. It is true that I am always competing with people but eventually I just need to focus on myself. Downtime is hard, potential takeover from others is tough to handle, yet all these non-controllable situations shall be managed with great patience.

Need to set my targets soon. If there's no target how am I going to hit it right?

前车之鉴

一直以来都不希望跟别人太过一样的我

很多时候都在找寻着自己的方向

生活中很多的想法观点其实都是跟别人学的

音乐带给了我很多的经历

给我带来了恋爱经历，也在生活中给我带来困苦中的激励

我要放弃的时刻往往都比要继续来得多

但确实是靠着这些歌词和歌手

让我明白了很多事

除了生活中在拼凑之外

在心态上还是希望有更多的成长

慢慢学着控制自己的情绪

有些时候总得忍，总得冷静一下

确实也只有自己帮到自己

我并不像身边很多的人一样

我是那个从小听着中文歌长大的人

其实蛮多人都不太喜欢

觉得中文歌永远都是在比较低的水平

觉得说英文永远比说中文来得好，来得高级

但我确实也就这样了哈哈，习惯吧

在别人往自己身上套上种种光环的时候

我都会卸下

我一直都不觉得我自己比别人优秀

但我希望我能够表现出一种不是每个人有的态度

我并不希望我能出任何的风头

但我希望我能够成为不可缺的那个关键

每个人的追求都不一样

对成功的定义也不一样

对我来说很多的小小的进步也是一种成功

别人认可或不认可其实也不是那么重要了

看了别人的经历

不代表我也要经历一样的事

也不代表我要避免别人的错误

而是，我要用这些经历和故事

来塑造自己的态度